Boracay Ten
Ten Minutes Before Leaving Manila I was….
1… in a gray top (that says “Save the Nation Through the Oblation”) and camouflage shorts and gray tsinelas
2… lagging two travel bags and a mailman bag. I overpacked, yes. I planned to jog on both mornings that I was there but failed. Horribly.
3… pissed about two other people on the plane (but this dissipated in time. They’re friends, what’re you gonna do.)
4… sitting beside my techie friend and fiddling with his iPhone. “Jailbroken ito” he’d boasted. Uh, okei.
5… starving, having unanticipated that we’d be boarding the plane by 1130, arriving in Caticlan by 1pm and Bora island by 230pm.
6… trying to recall the last time I got on a plane and what I did during take off and if I needed to use the paper bag in front of me.
7… thinking about how Cojie would behave during a plane ride and if he’d like it
8…. wondering if there’s an ATM in Boracay
9…. trying not to laugh when the bored Cebu Pac stewardess taught us how to use our lifevests.
10… praying the plane won’t crash because that would be a big bummer.
Celebrity Sightings
1. Bernard Palanca
2. Rajo Laurel
3. Abby Cruz (Paolo Bediones’ girlfriend)
4. Andrew Wolff (di na nadala ito hahaha)
5. Mo Twister
6. Mojo Jojo
7. Marc Nelson
8. Bamboo Manalac (he was in concert)
9. Papa Dom of Tropical Depression (he was in concert too)
10. Kat Alano (don’t know her? yeah, me neither.)
Officemate Sightings (harhar)
1. JF, the tiny AE who laughs real loud
2. CU of MSG’s Chinese Mafia
3. MSG alumna AG
4. The hearththrob (according to him haha) of radio sales, ND
5. Tall and svelte, partying in Heather’s, QTV’s JS
And finally
6. Whiter than white TdL
7. My new seatmate JL
8. Aforementioned techie with the jailbroken iPhone JZ
9. The only girl I know who can take and takes a good picture, GQ; and
10. MSD alum ML
because they were with me haha.
Grub & Gulp
1. Mang Inasal (pecho and achara and fried rice)
2. Jonah’s Shakes (mango banana and Jonah’s pizza)
3. Guilly’s Island (frozen margarita)
4. Sidebeach (wala namang sidewalk haha) stalls of inihaws (hotdog and daing na pusit)
5. Eat-all-you-can seafood (shrimps, clams, oysters, porkchop, eggplant)
6. Eat-all-you-can mongolian grill (I went crazy here)
7. Cafe Mediterranean (beef gyro and marinated olives)
8. Samba (pitcher of margarita, fries, calamares)
9. Some breakfast place near our place (can’t remember the name)
10. Starbucks (Mint capuccino for day 1, Latte for day 2)
Reasons why I’m exhausted
1. Watched/danced/sang with Tropical Depression and other reggae bands in the concert event of MTV called Rasta Rhythms. Bilog na naman ang buwan.
2. Posed ala-FHM on the beach because TdL’s boyfriend is a photog-wannabe. I think those pictures will never see the light of day.
3. Office gossip in the middle of the ocean. Hahaha.
4. Island hop (we missed puka beach, though. Waves were cruel because of the stupid storm).
5. “Listened” to Bamboo’s concert sponsored by Smart. Too many people in the venue so we decided to stay at the resto behind the stage and listen to him howl while we sipped on (almost waterlike) margaritas.
6. Frisbeed (we lost the frisbee boohoo)
7. Had a tattoo of a yin-yang sun on my shoulder which my son vehemently contested when I got home.
8. Bought pasalubong galore for my family
9. Continued office-gossip in Starbucks heehee
10. Danced alongside (not WITH — there’s a difference) smelly foreigners in Summer Place. Could see half-naked caucasian woman dancing on the DJ’s counter.
Ten Things I Learned from this trip
1. What people REALLY like in Boracay is walking around with barely any clothes on and it’s ok. And that goes for both beautiful people and … um…. those that are not.
2. You can’t wake up early in the morning to jog in Boracay. Those plans are only for places like Tagaytay or Batangas. In Bora, you can’t. Because you just slept.
3. You also can’t live blog in Bora. There’s just too many things to do. So next time, I have to leave you, laptop.
4. Water-resistant and waterproof are two very different things (my watch died).
5. We have such a beautiful country. Why are we screwing it up?
6. Based on photographic evidence and reliable feedback, I have nice shoulders and I should always flaunt it.
7. You can still have fun in Boracay even if it’s raining.
8. I don’t think I would have enjoyed Boracay if it weren’t for friends. These friends, in particular.
9. “The Real Coffee Place” — for calamansi muffins.
10. Must conceal any future tattoos from Cojie.
This trip is brought to you by…. (Brands that peppered the beachfront in my 3-day stay)
1. Smart
2. Nestea Fit
3. Nescafe (with the guys and the hot bods heehee)
4. MTV
5. Premium Condoms (Did you know that Asia Agcaoili, endorser of Premium condoms, is pregnant? harharhar)
6. Ginebra San Miguel
7. ETC
8. Jack TV
9. Century Tuna (we missed the hot bods finals because our friend was a die-hard Bamboo fan. So she paid for our fries and calamari. hehehe)
10. PAL Express
Ten Minutes before I left Caticlan I ….
1…. was very disappointed with breakfast. Small serving of tocino, sucky coffee, cup of rice, and an egg. For P250. “Beachfront kasi” GQ said. For ambiance, you pay twice the value.
2…. was weighed before departure. I gained 4 pounds. Yikes.
3…. entered the pre-departure area which had pay-per-view of the Pacquiao fight on Solar Access.
4…. was non-chalant about the whole Pacquiao thing but happy for the rest of my friends who were beside themselves, thinking we would miss it because our flight was at lunch.
5…. saw an old officemate, AG. “Ang payat mo!” she exclaimed. And to think I had just gained 4 lbs.
6…. thought that though Manny Pacquiao has been asshole-like in the last few months, there’s no contesting that he’s an amazing athlete.
7…. thought that Ricky Hatton fought like a street bully. (I was maka-Manny for the duration of one hour)
8…. clapped and cheered with the rest of the people in the pre-departure area as Hatton fell on his knees in round 1. (One of the Korean tourists had to be paged because his plane was leaving and he was still glued to the TV)
9…. stood up and rejoiced with the crowd when Pacquiao delivered that visibly very painful blow to Hatton’s jaw and the Brit fell like a log. Timberrrrrrr!!!!!!!!
10…. realized I had an awesome trip
