I Am The Walrus

Between 1974 and 1977, Jimmy and Alice tried to conceive a child. They have done everything — danced in Obando, spoke to spirits, did the meds, nothing.

Now Alice’s father Jacob had a sister Francisca — fondly called Kikay in her native Laguna. Since Kikay was 18 years old, she has been a "meduim" for a holy spirit her family has referred to as "Lola Ana". Lola Ana, apparently, is the mother of Mary who is the mother of Jesus. (I wonder if Mary has other relatives who are also making the spirit rounds?). As Lola Ana, Kikay had allegedly performed miracles — healed the sick, made predictions, all that stuff — since she can remember.

Anyhoo, Jacob suggested to his daughter Alice that he and Jimmy go to Lola Ana/Tiya Kikay in faraway Kalayaan, Laguna (it’s so far, it’s near…. after a few towns, you’re right back in the middle of Rizal) for help. So they did. Tiya Kikay went into a trance and Lola Ana spoke to them. Lola Ana/Tiya Kikay massaged Alice’s stomach, back and limbs (leaving her as greasy as a newly fried chicken) and the couple returned to Manila.

A month or so later, Alice got pregnant.

Due to the eeriness of the event, they just had to —- HAD TO — name this child Ana. (I wonder what would have happened if the baby turned out to be a boy). Also, she had to have an "R" second name so she can have the initials "ARAS" which is the small pouch filled with coins which the groom gives to the bride during the wedding ceremony.

So Jimmy and Alice tried various Ana "R" combinations: Ana Regina. Ana Rochelle. Ana Roberta. Ana Rumpelstiltskin. Ana Rhododenron. Ana Roastbeef.

Until one day, Alice (in her 5th or 6th month of pregnancy) saw on TV a tall, beautiful, busty woman named Raquel Welch. She admired the woman so much, and the sound of "Ana Racquel" just seemed right, that they decided that that would be the name of the baby.

Twenty-nine years later, the baby grew up and documented this story for all her friends to read because she had nothing better to do on a Sunday afternoon….

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Epilogue: Saturday, July 15, 2006 was the reunion of Alice’s clan on her father Jacob’s side which brought her, her husband Jimmy, her grown up (and blown up) daughter Ana Racquel and her grandson Jacob James Rafael (who twenty years from now might also document how his mother came up with this ridiculously long name) back to Kalayaan, Laguna. Much to the annoyance of the grown up Ana Racquel — everyone in the clan knows the story of how she got the name Ana Racquel that during the whole event, everyone would address her as Ana Racquel….

My Hugh Jackman link proved quite popular the last time I was here. (Especially to the hard core comic book fanatics, all two of you). So here are some more youtube jewels that entertain me once in a while.

I always talk about this stand-up comic Dane Cook, right? Here’s one of his acts where he talks about the Catholic religion.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym_fo_6LHmU&search=dane%20cook

This one is a video of two of my favorite people in the world, Jimmy Fallon and Adam Sandler, with Fallon doing Sandler. (I mean, Fallon does an impression of him. Not the… other thing…)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1GUaMdy1Yc&search=jimmy%20fallon

This one was a great find, it’s an NBC special on Scrubs bloopers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpuhCMW6L2Q&search=scrubs%20blooper

For Friends fans out there, here’s the gag reel for Season 7.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB9HvGWfsv0&search=gag%20reel%20

And finally, back to Hugh Jackman. This was his hosting gig in Saturday Night Live a couple of years ago. He is such a versatile actor!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OVWz0Eqw40&search=hugh%20jackman

Have you ever seen an unattractive person walking down the street — and you can be flexible with what your standards are of unattractiveness, bad hair, bad nose, overweight, buck teeth — and thought to yourself "I wonder if he/she has someone".

You will be surprised, he/she usually does.

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The best thing about a day off is being a participant observer. Getting on the MRT while everyone is running for the train while you just slowly walk to the platform is… oddly fun.

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Girlfriends are the best things in the world. They’re ANGELS, I tell you…. ANGELS.

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Go to this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnnTafAQTXQ&search=hugh%20jackman

You will never look at wolverine the same way again…

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What will I be doing this weekend? Watching romantic movies until I cry my eyes out while screaming "Why Not Me!!!!!’

Friday

I’ve said this a million times. Everytime someone resigns or retires, I die a little. It’s like someone finally made parole and I still have to continue with my life sentence. (As much as I love the company I work for, sometimes I feel like I’m in jail). It was Ate Chi-chi’s last day last Friday, she retired after 19 years of working. I worry about her, though. After nineteen years, on the first Monday that you don’t have to wake up at 6, fall in line for the MRT, swipe your time card… what exactly do you do?

We treated her out to Dencio’s in front of ABS-CBN. I got slightly frustrated as I was expecting ABS employees there, ready to pick a fight with us. Or at least  get to see Vhong Navarro.

Saturday

Alabang is FARRRRR….. I would not dare travel to Alabang on my own let alone with my son. But for the love of Abi and free Mcflurry, I did. Heck, it was an adventure. It was Abi’s pseudo-daughter’s (a close child-relative — preferably the child of a brother or a cousin — whose affections one pours into due to a lack of a child. The 90’s woman’s idea of surrogacy) birthday and it was held in McDonald’s Festival Mall Alabang. My son, Cojie, ever the snob, sat through the whole thing while all the other kids played parlor games. He threw his party hat at me, Abi and Abi’s mom (So sorry, Abi’s mom!) when we made him wear it. Thank God for the new and improved Ronald McDonald mascot who now looks more like a cartoon than a potential child molesting clown, my son snapped out of it and just… got in a better mood. Talk about weird.

Sunday

Of course, I’m going to write about Superman Returns. Superman/Clark Kent (I’ve said this a million times) is my version of what a guy should be: shy and geeky on the inside but superhero material on the outside. SInce Superman 1 was the first movie I ever saw, it was almost necessary that Superman Returns be the first movie Cojie will ever see. I think he enjoyed himself (hopefully not the way I did).

Brandon Routh is Christopher Reeve with a leather maroon (not red!) cape. His Clark Kent is the awkward and geeky kind and his Superman is probably 95% CGI. Whatever happened to hanging a guy on wires?

You would think that I would retire that night thinking about Brandon Routh in his tights but no. I bought a copy of Someone Like You on VCD and saw Hugh Jackman and got completely hooked. I watched all his X-men movies again before going to bed. Sigh. Maybe that’s why I can’t have a lovelife. I can’t even stick to one Superhero.